Hi. I have to go back and think about this. I was raised where both my parents punished. My father traveled a lot for work so mom was ready and willing to spank for bad behavior. Sometimes her spanks were more like reminders to “do better” while others, less frequent, were an out right solid spanking with “wait till your daddy gets home.” Daddy would use his big hand then lay it in using his leather belt. Mother would use her hand, wooden spoon, or wooden hairbrush. My father definitely had my respect. And “the look” that could send a stinging tingling sensation to my bottom, before any leather could. I guess if I were to be honest I kind of brushed off, no pun intended, my mother’s spankings. Ok, I got spanked. Like whatever! However, that was not the case for daddy. He was definitely the strong masculine leader that commanded respect which was freely and naturally given. His lectures alone could get me to tear up even before daddy gave me a reason to cry. Mothers maternal caring side came out to attend to me, that’s after corner time and daddy being completely satisfied with the results and my contrite apology. I would always “intend” to be a good girl on weekends when daddy was home! Now my man has since taken over my discipline and I feel he too is like my daddy. I’ll think about this further to see if there is anything else that would be beneficial to add.
Professional Women, As I read your comment my heart was beating fast. I could hear my father's lecture and honestly, like you my husband was cut from the same cloth. I honestly feel like the luckiest girl in the world to get a man like daddy. So despite wondering I am 100% satisfied with hubby handling my discipline. -Lisa
Hi Lisa, This might be a range. Yes you are right women are subject to a lot of violence in our society. I wonder if they wouldn't just think. Let's talk this out like two grown adults. We are subject to so much violence by men do we want to perpetuate this and are we okay with hurting each other? Of course there are same sex relationships where dd happens. Wonder what the statistics are. Are they higher or lower? Women also tend to be more egalitarian rulers. They might not want that power structure and the change to their relationship. Guess I don't know as I would never let my husband be physically violent with me but am learning a lot about this lifestyle from you. I wonder what others think? I like how you ask questions abdnot always easy on es. Wondering
Wondering, I have never done a social study on human behavior. My studies have always been in physics and Engineering. So I cannot talk inelegantly on the subject. I know I just got lucky because I have heard of DD relationships that have not done well with domestic violence. And I am not sure you are learning a lot from me. Because I feel I have a different kind of relationship. And also what you read from me is filtered through my brain. If you were here observing then you would see the whole story not what my brain processes. (okay that got weird sorry. I cut out something that was really dark leave me your email address, I wont approve it and I will message you what I was going to post) - Lisa
In the context of domestic discipline I have of course never been spanked by a woman before, and I have to admit... it would feel wrong and not natural for me to accept a spanking from another woman at this point in my life, even if it was at my husband's behest. I like and need the sort of direct communication and frankly the direct discipline style my man provides for me and for us. I know what you mean... it is hard to explain in words what makes it so different. I feel like I could never feel fully accountable to him if someone else, even more so if another woman, was spanking me.
But growing up, my parents both disciplined when needed and so I have plenty of experience being spanked by both parents lol. Your point about the maternal aspects is a very valid one... my mom could have more heart to heart conversations with me, girl to girl, than my dad was sometimes able to do when it came to when after a spanking was over. She was able to relate to me differently depending on what I was being spanked for, especially in those terrible preteen and teen years with my ten 'tude and hormones going through the roof, lol. Again, it is hard to describe, but there was a certain unique closeness that I felt when all was forgiven and my mom just let me come in for a close hug.
Now, as a mother myself, I can see it from my own mom's perspective a lot better too. And see how my husband and I's approaches differ.
Lisa - it’s Linda . Haven’t read your blog in a while (enjoying new grandchild!) but I did not know then when I suggested it, you would get such a collaboration going with the Pink Side 😀 well good for you if you enjoy it ! Mainly I suppose I suggested that first video because I felt that based on comments from some of your readers, their marriage is all about punishment all the time, which is sad and devastating. I just liked his DD should be no more than 10 percent and really much less. Glad you are enjoying the collaboration.
LINDA!!!! So happy for you with your grandchild!. Yes thank you for introducing me to his work. After I commented on a blog post of his and a video. He reached out to me and I told him about my blog. He liked some of my blog entries and then he invited me to do a post. I did and then he gave me permissions to post what I want on his substack. (crazy) Again thanks for showing me his work. -Lisa
Some of you have noticed that I often write about discipline, growth, and accountability in marriage. These are deeply personal themes for me — ones that have shaped my journey as a wife, mother, and woman of faith. Over the years, I’ve learned that being open about the way we find balance and strength in our relationships can encourage others who are on their own unique paths. This blog will continue to focus on reflections — the “why” behind what we do. It’s a space for heart and spirit, for lessons learned and the peace that comes from order and trust. I also keep another journal called “ Lisa’s Spanking Journa l ” , where I write in a more personal and detailed account of what happens. That space is more private — it’s where I record the detailed side of things, the moments of growth and discipline that are too intimate for this public space. If you’re here, this is the place to follow the broader story: faith, family, healing, and love that lasts. The other journal is simply my p...
When you become parents, the home changes in ways you could never have imagined. Spaces that once belonged just to the two of you now hum with small voices, toys, and the rhythm of family life. Yet amid all that love and chaos, couples still need their own private connection — those sacred pieces of marriage that remain just between husband and wife. As our children grew, my husband and I quickly learned the art of discretion. We realized that privacy isn’t about secrecy; it’s about protecting something precious. Intimacy, affection, and the rituals that strengthen our marriage aren’t meant for little eyes or curious questions. They belong in the quiet corners of adulthood — the moments that remind us we’re not just parents, but partners. We also learned that everyday life offers plenty of cover for keeping things private. The same household tools that fill drawers and hang in bathrooms can blend quietly into the background. Brushes on the bathroom counter. A belt on hubby’s waist. An ...
After a Private Moment of Correction There’s always a certain quiet that follows a private moment of correction between my husband and me. It’s not just the silence in the room, but the emotional stillness that lingers afterward. When we step back into the world—out to dinner, church, or the grocery store—I often carry that sense of humility and tenderness with me. It’s not visible to anyone else, but I can feel it with every careful movement, every reminder of the closeness we shared. Sometimes I catch myself being overly aware of my own body language. When I sit down, I do so gently, easing into the seat without drawing attention, but inside my thoughts race. Can anyone tell? Of course they can’t—but my mind plays tricks, making me think the whole world can see the private lesson written across my expression. There’s a curious mix of embarrassment and pride that comes with that feeling. Embarrassment, because I imagine others might somehow sense my discomfort. Pride, because I know w...
Hi. I have to go back and think about this. I was raised where both my parents punished. My father traveled a lot for work so mom was ready and willing to spank for bad behavior. Sometimes her spanks were more like reminders to “do better” while others, less frequent, were an out right solid spanking with “wait till your daddy gets home.” Daddy would use his big hand then lay it in using his leather belt. Mother would use her hand, wooden spoon, or wooden hairbrush. My father definitely had my respect. And “the look” that could send a stinging tingling sensation to my bottom, before any leather could. I guess if I were to be honest I kind of brushed off, no pun intended, my mother’s spankings. Ok, I got spanked. Like whatever! However, that was not the case for daddy. He was definitely the strong masculine leader that commanded respect which was freely and naturally given. His lectures alone could get me to tear up even before daddy gave me a reason to cry. Mothers maternal caring side came out to attend to me, that’s after corner time and daddy being completely satisfied with the results and my contrite apology. I would always “intend” to be a good girl on weekends when daddy was home! Now my man has since taken over my discipline and I feel he too is like my daddy. I’ll think about this further to see if there is anything else that would be beneficial to add.
ReplyDeleteProfessional Women,
DeleteAs I read your comment my heart was beating fast. I could hear my father's lecture and honestly, like you my husband was cut from the same cloth. I honestly feel like the luckiest girl in the world to get a man like daddy. So despite wondering I am 100% satisfied with hubby handling my discipline.
-Lisa
Hi Lisa, This might be a range. Yes you are right women are subject to a lot of violence in our society. I wonder if they wouldn't just think. Let's talk this out like two grown adults. We are subject to so much violence by men do we want to perpetuate this and are we okay with hurting each other? Of course there are same sex relationships where dd happens. Wonder what the statistics are. Are they higher or lower? Women also tend to be more egalitarian rulers. They might not want that power structure and the change to their relationship. Guess I don't know as I would never let my husband be physically violent with me but am learning a lot about this lifestyle from you. I wonder what others think? I like how you ask questions abdnot always easy on es. Wondering
ReplyDeleteWondering,
DeleteI have never done a social study on human behavior. My studies have always been in physics and Engineering. So I cannot talk inelegantly on the subject. I know I just got lucky because I have heard of DD relationships that have not done well with domestic violence. And I am not sure you are learning a lot from me. Because I feel I have a different kind of relationship. And also what you read from me is filtered through my brain. If you were here observing then you would see the whole story not what my brain processes. (okay that got weird sorry. I cut out something that was really dark leave me your email address, I wont approve it and I will message you what I was going to post)
- Lisa
Hi Lisa,
ReplyDeleteIn the context of domestic discipline I have of course never been spanked by a woman before, and I have to admit... it would feel wrong and not natural for me to accept a spanking from another woman at this point in my life, even if it was at my husband's behest. I like and need the sort of direct communication and frankly the direct discipline style my man provides for me and for us. I know what you mean... it is hard to explain in words what makes it so different. I feel like I could never feel fully accountable to him if someone else, even more so if another woman, was spanking me.
But growing up, my parents both disciplined when needed and so I have plenty of experience being spanked by both parents lol. Your point about the maternal aspects is a very valid one... my mom could have more heart to heart conversations with me, girl to girl, than my dad was sometimes able to do when it came to when after a spanking was over. She was able to relate to me differently depending on what I was being spanked for, especially in those terrible preteen and teen years with my ten 'tude and hormones going through the roof, lol. Again, it is hard to describe, but there was a certain unique closeness that I felt when all was forgiven and my mom just let me come in for a close hug.
Now, as a mother myself, I can see it from my own mom's perspective a lot better too. And see how my husband and I's approaches differ.
Hey Maya,
DeleteI think the difference is needed in a child's life.
Here is a question... what if it was a son being spanked by either dad or mom?
-Lisa
Lisa - it’s Linda . Haven’t read your blog in a while (enjoying new grandchild!) but I did not know then when I suggested it, you would get such a collaboration going with the Pink Side 😀 well good for you if you enjoy it ! Mainly I suppose I suggested that first video because I felt that based on comments from some of your readers, their marriage is all about punishment all the time, which is sad and devastating. I just liked his DD should be no more than 10 percent and really much less. Glad you are enjoying the collaboration.
ReplyDeleteLINDA!!!!
ReplyDeleteSo happy for you with your grandchild!.
Yes thank you for introducing me to his work. After I commented on a blog post of his and a video. He reached out to me and I told him about my blog. He liked some of my blog entries and then he invited me to do a post. I did and then he gave me permissions to post what I want on his substack. (crazy)
Again thanks for showing me his work.
-Lisa