Lisa Spanking Blog

One of the most important lessons I want my children to learn is respect — not just for their father, but for others, for themselves, and for the family we’re building together. It’s something that has to be lived out daily, not just talked about. I’ve learned that the best way for our kids to understand respect is to see it between their parents. In our marriage, my husband and I have built a relationship grounded in trust, grace, and guidance. He is the head of the house and deserves respect. We made a promise early on that we would handle disagreements quietly, never in anger, and always with love at the center. Over time, that promise has become a foundation for everything we do. And we promised that if I needed correction, it would be done in private and the children would not know.  My husband leads our family with such calm strength. Even when life gets hectic — when I’m overwhelmed, running behind, or feeling stretched too thin — he has a way of bringing me back to focus. S...

After a Private Moment of Correction There’s always a certain quiet that follows a private moment of correction between my husband and me. It’s not just the silence in the room, but the emotional stillness that lingers afterward. When we step back into the world—out to dinner, church, or the grocery store—I often carry that sense of humility and tenderness with me. It’s not visible to anyone else, but I can feel it with every careful movement, every reminder of the closeness we shared. Sometimes I catch myself being overly aware of my own body language. When I sit down, I do so gently, easing into the seat without drawing attention, but inside my thoughts race. Can anyone tell? Of course they can’t—but my mind plays tricks, making me think the whole world can see the private lesson written across my expression. There’s a curious mix of embarrassment and pride that comes with that feeling. Embarrassment, because I imagine others might somehow sense my discomfort. Pride, because I know w...

When you become parents, the home changes in ways you could never have imagined. Spaces that once belonged just to the two of you now hum with small voices, toys, and the rhythm of family life. Yet amid all that love and chaos, couples still need their own private connection — those sacred pieces of marriage that remain just between husband and wife. As our children grew, my husband and I quickly learned the art of discretion. We realized that privacy isn’t about secrecy; it’s about protecting something precious. Intimacy, affection, and the rituals that strengthen our marriage aren’t meant for little eyes or curious questions. They belong in the quiet corners of adulthood — the moments that remind us we’re not just parents, but partners. We also learned that everyday life offers plenty of cover for keeping things private. The same household tools that fill drawers and hang in bathrooms can blend quietly into the background. Brushes on the bathroom counter. A belt on hubby’s waist. An ...

In a world that often celebrates independence and self-direction, the idea of following can sound old-fashioned or even weak. But in my heart — and in our home — I’ve discovered something profoundly different: that choosing to follow my husband is not an act of weakness at all. It is one of the greatest honors and strengths I can offer, both to him and to the Lord. My husband cannot lead if I refuse to follow. Leadership and followership are not about superiority or inferiority — they are about harmony. God designed marriage to be a partnership, not a competition. When I resist, when I insist on my own way, I’m not just opposing him — I’m disrupting the balance that allows both of us to flourish. Following my husband doesn’t mean I lose my voice. It means I use my voice to encourage, support, and build him up. It means I trust the man God has placed in my life to lead our family with wisdom and prayer. And that kind of trust takes tremendous strength. It’s not always easy. There are mo...

Before we had children, marriage felt wonderfully simple. We could talk, laugh, and be as close as we wanted at any hour of the day without interruption. We didn’t have to plan or whisper, and there was a sweet freedom in knowing that our home was just ours — quiet, private, and peaceful. This included when I needed correction. If hubby felt I needed correction, the lecture and bottom warming would happen right away.  But as soon as our first little one began walking, everything changed. Suddenly, our home was full of tiny footsteps, curious eyes, and surprise visits when we least expected them. We had to learn how to balance being affectionate and handling my misbehaviors with being appropriate and private. It wasn’t easy at first — we both missed the ease of our early years, but we knew this new season required wisdom and care. For a while, we had to get creative. After the kids were in bed, the lectures and discipline would take place during evening walks on our property, in the...